Living the Dream

Everybody has a dream. Something that they’d do if money were no object, if they hadn’t made the life choices that they did, or if Kelly Brooke hadn’t taken out that restraining order.

Some of us are fortunate to be able to live our dreams, and mostly our lives turn out much for the better because of it. But everyone who’s ever nodded off after watching a scary movie after an ill-advised late-night cheese sandwich will know that not all dreams are good ones. Some turn out to be nightmares.

They say that you should be careful what you wish for, and some people most definitely dream dreams that are bad for them. Me? I dreamed of being a writer and due to circumstances that were at least partly out of my control (though maybe asking my boss to step outside a pub for a full and frank discussion on his managerial policies wasn’t my finest ever moment) I can now live that dream.

Is it what I expected? Pretty much, yeah. Although there are some things that weren’t in my gameplan. Even in my wildest dreams I knew that there would be a lot of hard work, that I’d spend much of my time wracked with self-doubt, that my mail would be mostly loads of rejections punctuated by the occasional successful publication. But loneliness? No, I hadn’t planned on that one. I should maybe have realised though that churning out a thousand words or so every day is something that you can only do on your own and the more enthralled by it you are, the more isolated you become, but I didn’t expect that I could go days on end without talking to anyone, that I’d become so wrapped up in my work that I don’t even realise that there’s an outside world to interact with.

I didn’t imagine that I’d start losing track of days either. My Beloved keeps asking why I’m always asking her what day is it. It’s because, from up here in my writing garret, they’re all the same. Wake, work, eat, sleep – and dream of stories.

But you know what? Whatever the downsides, every day that I spend writing is a heck of a lot better than being in a nine-to-five (and sometimes well beyond) office. Having the freedom to do the work that I want, when I want and being able to write wherever my imagination and my notebook take me nothing short of magnificent. Especially on days when the sun is shining.

Now I don’t know about where you are, but today is one of those days. So you’ll have to excuse me – I’m logging off and going for a walk. I’m working in the woods today.


© Shaun Finnie 2012