A Squirrel On My Patio

I went for a long weekend at Center Parcs, staying in a little lodge in the beautiful woodlands of central England. I woke up one morning and…  well the title tells you what I saw. I was so surprised by it looking at me looking at it looking at me that I wrote this children’s poem, for kids of all ages. You might like to read it aloud to your own? Whether you do or not, I think it should be read at the same pace that it was written – breakneck speed.

There’s a squirrel on my patio. Imagine my surprise
There’s a twitching to his nose and there’s a twinkling in his eyes

And a grinding of his jawbone as he chews with all his might
Yes he chews and chews until he’s eaten everything in sight

There’s a squirrel on my patio who’s getting rather plump
With a portliness of belly and a swelling of his rump.

I put peanuts out and birdseed to attract the little birds

But they wouldn’t come too close because – well, in so many words

There’s a squirrel on my patio. A squirrel, don’t you know,
With a big luxurious bushy tail and sharp claws on his toes

He’s eaten all that I’ve put out and then come back for more
And when I wasn’t quick enough he tapped upon the door.

There’s a squirrel on my patio requesting that I feed
Him with piles and piles of peanuts and a mountain of birdseed

Which I did but he just munched it all. It must be squirrel Heaven
He thought it was so wonderful, he called his mates – all seven

Now there’s squirrels on my patio, just over half a dozen
They'll be calling in their aunties next and uncles and their cousins

Saying “Come and join the party, there’s enough to go around”
As I fill up all the feeders that they’d previously found

So there’s squirrels on my patio demanding lots of food.
They’ve gobbled everything I’ve got. I’m not in a good mood!

But before I go to scare them off, I mustn’t be too hasty
I’ve got squirrels on my patio… I wonder if they’re tasty?